Book VII - Page 39

I met with Alleris or Blade today to take him to see Eli in regards to the alliance with the Crimson Covenant.
He wanted to kill himself off because of me in a relationship... Eli of course needed to show that i was his very clearly to Blade. He couldnt handle it. He felt i had betrayed him.. stabbed a knife through his back... It was never my intent but neither were we as a couple.. He just didnt understand who i am or tried to get to know me.
He was a complete lack of emotions... Why i even touched him so deeply i still dont know we only spend time together a couple of times and it always ended with us discussing. Besides he is mated now so why would he take it all like this.. why would he think that he had a change again just because we talked?
Well i left him there wanting to kill himself.. I didnt know what else to do.. I didnt listen nor did he even care what i had to say... Just more of the same... I feel sorry for his mate cause to be the second woman in his heart like this must be horrible.. Though I do have a feeling she dosent know and he is all good and sweet to her...

I talked with Keal at the camp everything seems just a bit quiet at the moment i just feel something is going to happen very soon.. I just dont know what...
I was pleased to hear Keal wants to take it slow with his new lover but I fear he cant hold to that.. But ill let him have the benefit of the doubt for now. 
Shan and Haffeleas came to the camp Haff wants to see if he can get back to life.. Shan might have an idea as to how this could be possible.
Beleth also came around.. He needs help but i just dont know how to help him to be honest. I need to let Eli handle that. Suddenly Keal went suicidal.. His new girlfriend showing up not understanding anything. But well i got him to calm down again and left him with his lover.

I do love the little ping pong i have with Shan... We are similar in so many ways...