Book VI - page 16

By all the twisting nether, why did he have to go there...
I meant every word i said to him... He knows to much now... Why do i keep telling him all this? Why can i not just put him in his place and if he dosent like then... fine

But to see him this night... his body glistening in the moonlight as he fought the female elf from Starlight. His muscles tone to the full and his agile fomr moving almost flurntly...

Ohh shut of stupid girl... he can never fill that whole that the master left, nor shut any mortal man. Get that pretty little head of your out from the clouds and down into the dirt again... stop being such a dreamer for things you will never have... you will NEVER be normal. Your twisted and shrivled up inside... your heart no longer beats and blood is the only thrill you still feel... You are cut... torn apart... now man up and do what you where instructed to do!
*the last peragraf has been written in a different handwriting*

Book VI - page 15

I understand why he feels used... I cannot blaime him...
Had i only meet him before all this. He reminds in ways of Adrias though without the mood swings.
But can he ever accept the path i walk... I need to walk?
I would choose him in a heartbeat had it not been that i can never let go... I do not love Ye *scratched out* n anymore i have laid that part of me bare, but i can never love like that again... I was to betrayed.. to hurt...
Oh sometimes i just wish to vanish in the twisting neather become one with the chaos i feel inside...

Well i meet with Corin again at the Lamb and he seems that he genuin want to join us.
I am excited about this new path... But will it work?

Book VI - page 14

No...no...no...
How could it be...
Why...

Now dont be a fool... he is just playing you... like always...
Dont sway from from your goal... not when you are so close... Be free of him... Be strong
Silly Silly girl can you not see what he is doing...

But why... Ohh by the neather... To be in his presence... To see him again
If only i could have touched him...


I was going through Stormwind when all of a sudden i was forced away... where i do not know... But there he stood... Just like before... Well he is not what he once was... That other presence was gone... He is with the Legion now...
He scolded me like always... Telling me that i had learned nothing from him... How could i when he never teached me anything. When i was not more than a toy for him to please himself.

But i will do his bidding... well some of it. I will put away my hurt and i will take my anger and use it to fuel me... make them my weapons.

But can i become strong enough... to take him? Could i somehow make alligence with the Legion to find out more?

I am a leader now which will come in handy for my further dealings... it is time to stop hiding in dark corners... No more sulking and whimpering...

I know what i must do... but first to satisfy this hunger for him... and there is only one capable of that, worthy of that... and he will kneel for me... beg for me... long for me with every fiber in his body... just like i long for my master

Book VI - page 13

Finally i got my markings... Ohh how i feel the shadows as a part of me now instead of just a weapon it has become a lover, a trusted friend... my companion...

But ohh by the nethers it hurt. Had it not been for Erinyea i am not sure i would have live through it.

It seems to have had a very interesting effect on my inner turmoil merging me and Erinyea more into one than before, i sence her greater and i feel she sences me. We are no longer two parts in fighting over one body... we are one... whole... stronger.

Ziz was there as i was marked, it is clear that she still longs for the shadows and the shadows long for her

shanra markede hende ziz var der sjanra forlod dem dem
var sammen med ziz
meet with wolfmoore at the lamb

Book VI - page 13

Finally i got my markings... Ohh how i feel the shadows as a part of me now instead of just a weapon it has become a lover, a trusted friend... my companion...
But ohh by the nethers it hurt. Had it not been for Erinyea i am not sure i would have live through it.

It seems to have had a very interesting effect on my inner turmoil merging me and Erinyea more into one than before, i sence her greater and i feel she sences me. We are no longer two parts in fighting over one body... we are one... whole... stronger.

Ziz was there as i was marked, it is clear that she still longs for the shadows and the shadows long for her and so did I... I have wantet her ever since she broke before me the first time over three years ago... I do not care for her powers, they do not interest me but to see her true self... The shadows were so strong so tempting and i gave in to it all, let everything fill me... the shadows, the power, the lust and desire... Ziz...

I hope this sharing of essences will keep us as we were ment too... walking side by side as sirens... as sisters... as one...

I think i have found a new protector a new oath brother... i will meet him tomorrow to find out more...

Book VI - page 12

Well my first meeting with the oath went well. It didnt seem that anyone niticed anything so i guess i have done well in making the connection as subtle and faint as possible. Diig seemed to like Jade as we had a most thrilling time trying out how i experience things as Jade.

I meet with Shanra, Zizey and Narmia at Ziz camp in redridge but like always it was a distaster... why do i even bother with the two of them... Though after Ziz left we went to the keep and i found out that Nam is working dobbelt for Shanra and Zizey... Interesting...


I was slightly annoyed when i meet with Garret but he helped me let of steam and the practice was fun... he is intriging i must admit... Funny why Ziz did not stay with him...

Book VI - page 11

Silly silly girl... do you even fatom the concequenses of your actions...?

Well many would indeed feel privilages to be trained by the ones i have called masters.
Destiny *the word seems to have been hard to write* Death and Balance... and now The Reaver

And still there is only one for with the words master truely applies...
*a tear has hit the page*

There are only a few left i feel i can trust, only i few a cherrish... And that is my weakness i still feel to much... Diig is by my side without question willing to give his life for me i would dare say and for what, I could never truelly love him... Just as i could not love Cy, Ami and Gabriel.

I am broken... I am not whole anymore... I have removed all those fellings... Letting her feelings govern my actions... I seek solace in the shadows... In the power they have given me.

Selasius came to me today wanting me to help Zizey... Somethings i wrong with him i sence the difference in him a twisted spark of my sister in some way... I need to find out what this is all about... I need to call the sisters together and maybe the oathbound as well.

I had my first lesson with Garret this evening...
It was interesting to say the least... But i am unsure if i should proceed, if this a ruse from him... This way of training i do not like, he gets to know to much...
To much he can use against me...
But to see the desire in his eyes and not giving in to him... makes it all worth it...